It has surprised me that this contact to my past existed.
I lived at Monte Pio. I do not have many good memories of this experience.
You may remember the girl that was often sitting outside the TV room with a cake of soap in her mouth for daring to suck her thumb.
Although I will always be grateful to the sisters for giving me a home I will never forget the abuse I received at their hands.
I admit I was a strange child and did not form deep friendships while I was in the home but I do have some nice memories of some of the girls so I would be interested to know if anyone remembered me.
I would have been at Monte Pio in 1962 I left around 1966. I was working in the kitchen before I left.
I remember a girl cutting bread on the cutting machine and it took a large piece off the palm of her hand.
I was also there when a girl’s father died her story was in the Take Five magazine not long ago.
I would like to go to the reunion if my situation allows.
It has raised many feelings finding someone who lived at Monte and I have such a need to reminisce.
I was born in 1951 and first went to Monte when I was about 4 or 5 years old. I went there with two sisters Gloria and Susanne. I have no memory of this first time only vague impressions and feelings. I do vaguely remember sleeping in the baby dorm. I have feelings of the small room (in the room with the stage) having our pinnies that we wore over our clothes.
When I returned I was on my own and a girl told me I had been there before and used another name. That was when I was told my real name which I had forgotten. Mother Louis was in charge. There was another Mother whose name I do not remember before Mother Louis. I have good memories of Mother Louis.
Sister Henrietta was another one I remember. I loved this nun. She arranged for me to spend a holiday at her family’s home and when I came back I told a girl that it was boring. This girl told the Sister. Well that nun took me into the assembly room (with the stage in it) and held one of my hands and belted me with a cane.
I was at Monte when the girls put on a concert called “The Sound of Music” in this room and it left a real impression on me and I went to see this movie 10 times after I left the home. I remember the concerts we put on in the stage on the property after we had ballet lessons. (I had 3 left feet, the desire was there but not the ability.)
My favourite time was climbing the mulberry trees and eating the mulberries. I loved to play around on the piano and remember a girl teaching me to play chop sticks.
It was at Monte that I first discovered my love of reading. I would spend hours in the room (with the stage) reading. When I was older I remember going to the factory and collecting the lollies they gave to us. Going to the pictures and eating the ice-blocks. Having our hair done out for head lice in the open washhouse out the back. Going for walks on the property and surrounding areas. The apprentice hairdressers doing our hair, how I hated that, we always looked terrible after one of these hair cuts. I never went to the convent high school; I caught a train and went to the State school as the nuns thought I was not brainy enough to go to the convent.
A couple of years ago I decided to see if I could find anyone from Monte and any information. I did find out about the home now being a Motel and when my family went to Sydney I stopped in at Maitland and went to the home. (Boy did that evoke many different emotions in me!) But all other information I found was very sketchy almost non existent. So I thought I would just leave it alone.
Well a couple of nights ago I was looking up cancer as a friend has just been told she has it and I was looking up the cancer she has. I don’t know why I decided to again look for Monte Pio but I did. I found CLAN and found your site through them. I looked through everything that was there – the poems, the photos, each and every page. I could not believe that reunions had been going on for years.
My situation could be unique as my mother and her sisters were also at Monte in the early years (war time) and her brothers were in the boy’s home. So the older photos and information is also of interest to me. I was very excited about the reunion photos but of course did not recognise anyone. I was a bit sad at the older photos as they could not be enlarged and faces could not be seen but I found them interesting anyway.
Your site is well done and informative and I found it non-biased. This did put me off a bit as I thought maybe my memories of Monte were different to others and any negative responses would not be welcome and I feel the need to remember and talk about the good and the bad of Monte and wondered if that would be possible. But as you see I did not let this stop me and did e-mail to you.
You said not to let bitterness ruin our life. It may sound funny but I do not think of my time at Monte with bitterness. Monte was my refuge. The outside world was a much more abusive place for me. I did not fit in at Monte. I remember having girls to play with but no real deep lasting friendships. My life outside of Monte moulded me into a child that would appear to other children as different.
Many years ago I worked through my life and all my experiences. This started when I was 14 when Mother Louis sent for me and told me my mother wanted me to go home, Mother asked me if I wished to go. I made the decision then to stay at Monte as even though it was not perfect I knew for me this was the best place for me to be.
I am not saying that I don’t look back on Monte with sadness at some of the things that happened. I also feel such a need to talk to others from Monte but bitterness – No. That is not a part of how I feel.
My life helped shape me into who I am today I am proud of who I am. I have not reached any great heights. I am just me.
I know all of us from Monte would have learnt many valuable lessons from our experiences good and bad from being at Monte. (I know it would have been better to learn these from a good and loving home but for us this was not how it was.)
From the abuse we would have learnt compassion for others in pain (emotional or physical). That children need to know they are loved and valued. We would have learnt how children feel when they are abused, how soul destroying it is. How helpless it makes the child feel. We would have learnt from holidays in other family’s homes, that there are many different ways that families work. That the way some of us were raised was not the only way it had to be. We saw how different each person was. Adults – some cruel, some gentle, some loving, some compassionate and we had a choice to model any of these.
We of Monte would have learnt much that we would have taken with us into our adult life.
I remember all the things and places that you have mentioned in the e-mail.
Do you remember the Grotto at the front of Monte? I spent hours and days at that Grotto. It was overgrown and I cleaned it up and spent many hours there. It was my safe place.
As we talk and exchange histories I find I remember more.
I told you I was at Monte twice but it turns out I was there three times. The first time I was in the baby dorm (4 or 5), then the middle dorm (8 or so), and then the older girls dorm (12 to when I left at 15 years old).
Do you remember after coming back from holidays the rush to pick your bed and how some girls would move the name tags from the bed so they could sleep next to their friend? How we all rushed to get the best mattress or pillow. Some girls even dragging the mattress to another bed, fast so sister would not catch them. Do you remember the verandah off the big girl’s dorm it was not used when I was in the big dorm. I remember lining up near the big cupboards near the middle dorm handing in clothes and getting others. Being in the sick room near the middle dorm.
There were twins at the time I was there. A girl who had a little sister with beautiful red long hair.
I remember climbing and running up some iron and as I grabbed the edge it cut my fingers. The nun was very upset with me for getting hurt and as the blood ran down the sink she gave me a good dressing down about my stupid act. I have a reminder of that day with scars on my hands.
I remember singing in the church. Well what I should say is I remember holding the board up with the words on so the girls could sing and was told by the sister not to sing. I can’t say I blame her as I could not hold a tune at all.
Do you remember the play area out the back with the swings and the merry-go-round (I use this name as I do not remember its correct name) and how many girls flew off this when it was being pushed very fast by others?
I also spent a lot of time in the basement on the pretext of tiding it out. The sister opened the wire doors to let me tidy it and I spent hours dressing up in the old clothing and going through the boxes. (Did I mention I was a strange child?)
I must try and get to the reunion as the memories just keep coming. How does anyone get a word in edgeways at these reunions we must all have so much to share? I can’t be the only one where it just keeps flowing out.
It is late and I am tired so I will sign off now. Remembering can be quite tiring.